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Articles about our conversation salons
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STEVE ROSENBERG/STAFF PHOTOGRAPHER Intellectual stimulation salon: By Kathaleen Roberts |
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A ‘60s flashback? Some kind of transplanted opium den? Or aging hippies stuck in a time warp? None of the above; it’s Gertrude Stein meets Elgin. Kathy Hamill and Robin Slater were hungry for conversation; so starved that they launched their own monthly salon. But this gathering has nothing to do with permed hair and acrylic nails. It’s a throwback to the turn-of-the-century meetings in the famous writer’s Paris apartment, where Stein met with artists and intellectuals ranging from Matisse and Picasso to Fitzgerald and Hemingway to discuss ideas and share inspirations. “We were looking for a circle of friends that everybody seems to have in their minds, but no one seems to have in real life,” said Hamill, a 46 year old attorney with the Kane County Appellate Defender’s office. Slater, 55, who provides computer support for Sears, was searching for something far beyond the sports bar scene. “It’s head and shoulders above, ‘What about those Cubbies?’ and ‘Have you seen Seinfeld?’,” he said. The couple advertised in both The Courier News and in the Chicago Reader, and posted fliers in libraries and bagel shops. In March, 21 strangers appeared at their Elgin home. Participants drive from as far away as Oak Park, Riverside and Chicago, Palatine, Crystal Lake and Naperville. A few hail from Elgin, St. Charles and Geneva. Three are European. One is a sculptor; there are social workers, teachers, engineers and blue-collar folks. The male to female split is about even; most are in their 40s. The group votes on topics veering from the ideal political system to whether anything positive is still salvageable from the ‘60s. A recent gathering centered around a more famous conversation from the 1981 Louis Malle film My Dinner With Andre. Building contractor George Murphy drives to the salon from Rolling Meadows. He also attends a fine arts film discussion group and a river rafters’ club. “I’m curious,” he said. “The more input I can get, the happier I am.” Of Italian-French extraction, Wheaton resident Alexander Ano attended salons in Europe. Founder of Oakbrook’s International Cultural Center, Ano shows his work in Chicago, San Francisco and New York, as well as in Europe. “I grew up in a salon environment,” he said. “We used to do it when we were kids. We’re going to be starting one on Michigan Avenue. It’s collaborative engagement, so you don’t associate with the same people every day.” Elgin travel consultant Anita Denmark started coming to interact with interesting people. I like “getting my brain waves activated,” she said. “I get bored easily, and this isn’t boring.” ______________ The Andre discussion centered on man’s search for meaning and experience in a world in which most of us struggle just to pay the rent. In the movie, New York theater director Andre experiences a breakdown as he flits from country to country, undergoing everything from bizarre tribal rituals to a fake burial in search of an intensity of experience. His dinner companion and playwright Wally, both fascinated and dumbfounded by Andre’s exotic stories, is too bound to the daily struggle to earn a dollar to take such a psychic and emotional leap. Several members said Andre enjoyed a luxury most of the rest of us can’t afford, thanks to his obvious wealth. “It takes people with money longer to hit bottom, that’s all,” Murphy said. Rediscovering yourself “can be done in a cigar store as well as on Mt. Everest,” Elgin’s Denmark added. “I think Andre found out it was much more risky to spend 20 years with the same woman than it was to have an affair.” _______________ If the subject matter circles and dives too far out into the ozone, Slater takes on the role of salon cop and calls for a “time out.” “It’s a benign dictatorship,” he said. “We are just letting things flow as long as it doesn’t turn into a monologue,” Hamill added. “There’s a lot of good verbal dancing that goes on.” Some initial callers were incredulous that the group was free. Others assumed it was a singles club, a delusion Hamill and Slater quickly dashed as they weeded out the lonely and the patronizing. One caller demanded anonymity, saying he was too well known to leave his name, then asked the couple to page him. “We don’t page people,” Slater deadpanned. “It was incredible,” Hamill said of the first meeting. “Everybody was absolutely delightful. No one was scary or anything.” The pair tried other discussion groups–among them, the Oak Park, Mensa-based Free Inquiry Network–but found them aloof. Hamill decided to form her own salon after hearing a teacher read a poem at Chicago’s Green Mill poetry slam. “He said get rid of TV and organize your own theater to make your own ragged joy. That appealed to me.” |
